BR TO OTTOLINE MORRELL, [31 MAY 1911]
BRACERS 17168. ALS. Morrell papers #94, Texas
Proofread by K. Blackwell et al.

In the train
Trinity College,
Cambridge.1^, 2
Wed. night

My Life

I can never tell you what you are to me — it is something beyond words altogether. All this time I had a solemn almost religious feeling — there is something about our love that seems so much greater than I am that I hardly understand how I can feel it. I have not felt that when I loved before, and I have never read of it in poetry or elsewhere — it is something due to what you are. It is that that makes our love so precious and also so necessary to me. I don’t really quite know why it is that we affect each other as we do, but I see that we make each other better people than we could otherwise be, and that our love seems to raise us to very wonderful heights. And I know that you have drawn me into you till there is absolutely nothing of me that is not yours — you live in my deepest depths, and I have no thoughts that do not refer to you. You have so interpenetrated my heart that if you withdrew you would draw out my heart too and I should be left like the man in the Bard of the Dimbovitza.

Dearest it was a very perfect time — I felt the deep solemnity of our love more than ever before. I did not suppose any one feeling could be so satisfying — it is religion and beauty and everything, as well as love.

I had supposed those old writings of mine were better — I am sure I can improve on them now. I enjoyed the Spinoza lesson immensely — I wonder if you did. I should like to go on with philosophy with you — it will be less trouble for you than going to St. Andrews.

Now I must stop and post this. I caught my train easily, and shall probably reach Cambridge before 10.

Goodbye my heart — My love for you is as deep and boundless as the sea. I cannot tell you how great it is, but I know you know.

Yours in utter devotion
B.

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  [document] Document 000094. Proofread against a colour scan of the original.

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  [envelope] A circled “94”.