BR TO CONSTANCE MALLESON, [11 DEC. 1917]
BRACERS 19256. ALS. McMaster
Edited by S. Turcon. Reviewed by K. Blackwell

<London>
Tuesday1^, 2

My dearest Darling Loved One

It was a joy to come upon your little note3 this morning tucked away in a corner of Miss Rinder’s4 big letter5 — and such a dear note too. I wish your letters to me were as long and frequent as hers!

Darling I feel so full of warm gentle love to you — I wish I could make you feel less worried and harried — perhaps I can in time — I do hope so —

Your little note makes me have a faint whisper of hope that possibly you may be willing to come to the Studio tomorrow night — though I hardly dare let myself imagine such a thing — especially as you are unwell. If you did, I should be so happy! I am still in the mood I was in Sunday —

I wonder what it is you have to say to me. I long to know. You alarmed me rather by saying perhaps I should find this Xmas worse6 than any previous one. — I feared you might be contemplating something very drastic.

I love the Studio,7 and can be perfectly happy there if you can. I feared you would say or make me feel you hated it, so I said it first, to ward off the blow. But it was a lie. I often lie in that way.

Goodbye till tomorrow, my heart’s love. Let me know where to meet — Best say Isola Bella8 7.15 — I am having tea with Ottoline9 so can’t be earlier. All my heart goes out to you, my Beloved.

B

• 1

  [document] Document 200244.

• 2

  [date] Colette wrote “11th Dec. 1917.” on the letter.

• 3

  your little note Her note of 10 December in which she hoped to see BR on Wednesday (BRACERS 113101).

• 4

  Miss Rinder W. Gladys Rinder (1882–1965). For information on her, see BRACERS 19044, n.5.

• 5

  big letter This letter appears not to be extant, although several of her letters are not dated.

• 6

  this Xmas worse Christmas 1914 and 1916 were bad for BR. See BRACERS 19186 and 19233, n.6.

• 7

  the Studio The name given to the place that they had rented on the ground floor at 5 Fitzroy Street, Soho. For information on it, see BRACERS 19240, n.9.

• 8

  Isola Bella Possibly the Italian restaurant of that name at 15 Frith Street in Soho. It was open in 1939 owned by Pierino Micotti.

• 9

  Ottoline Lady Ottoline Morrell (1873–1938). For information on her, see BRACERS 19077, n.5.