BR TO CONSTANCE MALLESON, [10 OCT. 1917]
BRACERS 19228. AL. McMaster
Edited by S. Turcon. Reviewed by K. Blackwell

<letterhead>
57 Gordon Square,
London. W.C.1.1^, 2^, 3

I don’t want to drive you to despair,4 I really don’t. I don’t want you to do anything different from what you are doing — I think you are doing perfectly right. I am not surprised that you can’t understand — I don’t know that I do myself. Perhaps there may be some obscure underground impulse of revenge, wishing you to feel some small part of the pain I have felt. If there is, I am sure it is quickly dying, and it is certainly not conscious. — I wish I could still care for you — I would if I could make myself — but I don’t.

There seems nothing more to say.

• 1

  [document] Document 200214.

• 2

  [envelope] The Lady Constance Malleson | 6 Mecklenburgh Square | W.C.1. Pmk: LONDON. W.C. | 3.15 PM | OCT 10 17 6. Colette wrote on the envelope “This is a reply to Colette’s of same date” (BRACERS 19228).

• 3

  [date] The date is taken from the envelope postmark.

• 4

  drive you to despair In her letter of 10 October, Colette writes: “I cannot even attempt to put into worlds the immense desolation in my heart because you no longer want my love.” She then goes on to ask: “What is it in you that is trying to drive me to despair?” (BRACERS 113074).