BR TO OTTOLINE MORRELL, [4 MAY 1913]
BRACERS 17894. ALS. Morrell papers  #764, Texas. SLBR 1: #204
Edited by N. Griffin. Proofread by A. Duncan and K. Blackwell

Sunday night.1^, 2

My Darling Darling

I was overjoyed to get your letter this morning saying you could see me tomorrow afternoon — I can’t tell you how glad I am. The last two days I had been rather sad and listless, but today has been quite different — It seems odd that the prospect of an hour with you can so alter the whole aspect of the universe — but it is so. You must prepare yourself however for a dreadful blow! Thinking I shouldn’t see you for 6 weeks, I have had my hair cropped quite short — it will horrify you, but I thought it would please all my relations tomorrow night. — The only thing that worries me is whether there is any chance of my carrying the infection of Mildred’s influenza. I have arranged to lunch with her, so I can get home and even change my clothes — I really don’t know whether the infection does carry in that way, but I should not like to give you influenza. I am going up by the 10 o’clock train. If you think there is any risk of your catching it through my seeing her, would you telegraph to me at Great Northern Station, Cambridge, and then I will telegraph to her to say I can’t come (I can see her on Friday.) Nothing would induce me to miss seeing you, but if you don’t telegraph, I shall assume you think it is all right. I will reach my flat about 4, and hope for you soon — if I am to come to you, please send a line to my flat. There — that ends plans. Hurrah.

I have been bubbling over with delight — all day — it has led to my doing a great deal of work — still sketching out my book on Theory of Knowledge — I have got the early part quite elaborately sketched, and the whole pretty fully in my head. If I can write it while you are away it will keep me happy. I wish somebody would supply me with a perpetual succession of mild novels — I go to the Union3 and fetch them, but I never know what to get. Some are too bad and some too good (if they are really interesting they take one’s thoughts off work too much). Since the time at Churn4 when I turned my thoughts back to work, I have had a number of fruitful ideas. This work is just what is needed before tackling Matter — in fact I can bring in the most interesting part of the problem of Matter. I have begun to think again that I may get Matter completely polished off before I die. If only I could sleep 8 hours a night, I could perform miracles.

Darling Darling I can’t sita still for excitement thinking of seeing you again — I can’t write about trivial things. I had no idea how much I was going to mind your going. But I don’t mean to waste any time tomorrow the way I did last time — I will pour forth love and love and more love every instant. Goodnight my Beloved my Heart. All my soul is yours yours your,

B

• 1

  [document] Document 000764. Proofread against a colour scan of the original.

• 2

  [envelope] A circled “764”. The Lady Ottoline Morrell | 44 Bedford Square | W.C. Pmk: CAMBRIDGE 11.15 PM | 4 MAY 13

• 3

  I go to the Union The library in the Cambridge Union.

• 4

  time at Churn Ottoline and Philip had spent the previous September in a remote farmhouse at Churn on the Berkshire downs. It belonged to her brother Henry.

Textual Notes

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  sit after illegible deletion