BRACERS Record Detail for 17196
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"It has been peaceful here, Bob reading me his poems as usual—they are of no value but I don't tell him so, as I don't think he could do anything better. We went a long walk with a bathe in the middle this afternoon—it was very beautiful. But Bob was a bit of a bore. Their little boy is called Julian, which causes confusion in my mind. He is a nice child, I always rather enjoy people who have children—if possible—nice children are so extraordinarily lovable. Bob and Bessy are happy together, though Bob would not make any woman happy who wasn't a saint—he is so very selfish and oblivious of others. All the same I have a great affection for him. He has an odd placid existence with his books—no temptations or storms or upsets—only the half-faced knowledge that his is no good. He is oddly literary—he never approaches any feeling directly, but always through what the poets have said about it. I half despise his life, yet I find it restful, and I have often enjoyed the holiday from real things. At present I don't need that, so my visit is less enjoyable than some previous ones."
Sunday night
BR TO OTTOLINE MORRELL, [18 JUNE 1911]
BRACERS 17196. ALS. Morrell papers #119, Texas
Proofread by K. Blackwell et al.
Shiffolds
Sunday night
<letterhead>
Trinity College,
Cambridge.1, 2
My Dearest Dearest
I was glad of your letter this morning — no letter had reached me at More’s Garden, but I dare say I shall find it tomorrow. The enclosed, written this morning, could not be posted, as Bob came down at the critical moment. — I am very sorry you were still ill yesterday evening, and I don’t expect you will be well tomorrow. However I do hope you will be well enough for me to come. I shall come at three unless I get word to the contrary at More’s Garden. I needn’t be back at Cambridge till 9, which means a 7.30 train. — It has been peaceful here, Bob reading me his poems as usual — they are of no value but I don’t tell him so, as I don’t think he could do anything better. We went a long walk with a bathe in the middle this afternoon — it was very beautiful. But Bob is a bit of a bore. Their little boy is called Julian, which causes confusion in my mind. He is a nice child. I always rather envy people who havea children — nice children are so extraordinarily lovable. Bob and Bessy are happy together, tho’ Bob would not make any woman happy who wasn’t a saint — he is so very selfish and oblivious of others. All the same I have a great affection for him. He has an odd placid existence with his books — no temptations or storms or upsets — only the half-faced knowledge that he is no good. He is oddly literary — he never approaches any feeling directly, but always through what the poets have said about it. I half despise his life, yet I find it restful, and I have often enjoyed the holiday from real things. At present I don’t need that, so my visit is less enjoyable than some previous ones.
Bob has been seeing Roger but has not heard anything from him about you, I should judge. He described rather amusingly an occasion when you and he had disagreed about Henry James — all he said was pleasant to hear. I was much afraid Roger might have talked against you to him, which would have been awkward if he had begun repeating it, because I couldn’t have stopped him or said much. But evidently nothing of the sort had occurred —
Darling I long to be with you more than I can say — it is hateful when you are ill and I can’t be with you, and if I am with you I feel I keep you from resting. I do long for you to be in the country and I long for you to get rest. You must tell me if there is any way in which your nervous strength could be less tried. Don’t think it is unselfish to keep things to yourself. Goodnight my Heart. I love love love you, and I do really long for your good and not only for what I get from you. My dearest Life, you are all the world to me — this is true strictly.
More’s Garden Monday
Dearest I got your letter at Shiffolds this morning and another here. I will come at 3.15. Yes I will stay to dinner with the greatest joy. Thank you — your letters are a great joy. You needn’t be hurt about duty and the rest — I will explain. No time for more now.
Yr
B
Textual Notes
- a
have written over indecipherable word